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Today is the fourth anniversary of the death of my father. It’s hard to write about it, because Dad and I were very close for most of my life. The grief I have from this loss is still overwhelming at times. He was a funny, brilliant, stubborn, laid-back man who worked hard at what he loved (engineering), for those he loved (his family), sharing his passion for what he loved (sailing–see the picture of him on the dock).
Dad helped begin my love affair with frugality and fostered my anti-consumerist tendencies, but also reminded me that it is ok to spend money on what really matters in life. He supported all my adult career and personal decisions, loved Min and J deeply, and never failed to make the right joke at the right time. I cannot adequately express the joy and love he brought (and continues to bring) into my life. That he will never know H (and she will never know him) is one of the few real regrets in my life.
“Today is the first day of the rest of your life.” (Dad’s favorite Dad quote.)
Now that I am a parent, I appreciate the constant, steady presence Dad had throughout my childhood more than ever. He loved my mom in a way that taught me what romantic love really should be. He encouraged me to take chances and believe in myself. I feel his absence every day, as do the other members of my family. But lately, I’ve been in a place to just appreciate what time we were able to share. Life is short; Dad’s impact is enduring. I hope to provide my own children with as much acceptance, humor, and challenge as my Dad provided me. Thanks, Dad. Always.
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