Sunday, November 22, 2009

Goodbye Single Life...

Min Gi moved the last of his things into my place (our place... I'll work on this, I swear) last night.

Don't get me wrong, he's had most of his stuff here since September and spends about half his nights here, even though the majority of his clothes were at his old place that is much closer to his office job... so it's not like I don't know what it's like to spend a lot of time with him.

It's just that... since we're getting married in a few (less than seven) weeks this means I'll never have my own place again (barring something horrible happening). I'm having some ambivalence about this gaining of a life partner, loss of independence thing.

I'm really excited to be starting our life together, and I love living with a man who does the dishes and cleans the floor as part of his "daily exercise" (I cook and do the laundry--lucky me, the chores I actually enjoy doing!). However, I've lived alone since November 2006 (good lord I loved that first solo apartment) and sharing a place with someone... well, it changes your lifestyle. Dramatically.

For me, it's mostly good things. I go to bed when I say I'm going to bed because I'm actually accountable to keep my word. Ditto for keeping schedules and exercise habits. I don't eat as much junk food because I love cooking for Min Gi (he likes everything I make, even though it doesn't have meat... and again, does the dishes!), and because of that accountability thing (it's harder to sneak off and buy a chocolate bar from the store if someone is asking where you're going as you put on your shoes). And the fact that there's a much greater chance of someone being home to cuddle (etc.) when you need it besides the kitties!

However, some things I miss. Korean news is on every morning now when I come home from AM yoga, which kind of disrupts the peace. Sometimes, I buy things to eat (or plan to eat things I cooked last night for lunch) and when I come home, they're gone. I have to pick up after myself more (it's kind of rude to just let stuff accumulate in corners when other folks live there). He sees me on "ugly days," which I've been having a lot of lately because of the medications (I could just make the effort to not have "ugly days" I suppose, but I don't know if that would be good for my sanity), which I don't like. Min Gi still leaves the toilet seat up about 50% of the time, and (I have no idea how) manages to coat the entire bathroom floor in water every time he uses it. I'm an introvert and my love is an extrovert--good lord he needs to talk--a lot (although, if I must be honest, I love hearing what he has to say at least 95% of the time, which is pretty awesome).

So today, I'm just taking a moment to say goodbye to those single girl, solo-apartment behaviors I've come to love (well, at least be comfortable with) over the last three years (almost to the day--eerie). Will I miss my peace and solitude? Sure. Sometimes.

But what I'm getting in return--cannot be compared. I really am the luckiest girl ever--to have found a man who thinks he's the luckiest boy ever.


  1. Congrats on the upcoming wedding - and yes, it'll definitely be a HUGE change. It's one that many couples are shocked about (you mean he doesn't know to put the toilet seat or put a new roll of TP on?), but that's where communication comes in real handy.

    You'll block out the Korean news soon enough - or you could be listening to an MP3 player so once walking in it's not something you'd hear to begin with.

    BTW - I'll be looking for my blog on your sidebar - I added you not too long ago...

  2. The annoying stuff is pretty minor compared to the good stuff. :-)

  3. Re: the wet floor... Is he using the shower as a makeshift bidet?

  4. I think he just washes very vigorously. Often washing his hair and feet, thus using the shower. It is weird, though.

    We're going to have to learn that there is no drain on the floor in America.

  5. Yeah, man- the wetting of the floor - and often the toilet as well is an ongoing battle between me and my boyfriend. At first, I thought he was just going in there and peeing all over the place, but it turns out all the puddles are just from the way he washes his hands and face after. I suppose I should be happy to have such a clean man around, but I don't think I'll ever get used to the water all over the bathroom.

    You're right! How's it going to work out once you're back in America? I explained to my boyfriend how there's no drains in the bathroom floor back home, and people take care not to put water all over it. I told him that even though I know it's water I'm stepping in (sitting down on - UGH!) some part of my brain will always scream that it's URINE and ewwww, it's gross gross gross!

    Congratulations on your upcoming wedding and the moving in together. I totally hear you about this post, though. I know I'd have a really hard time being accountable to anyone but the cat. I haven't felt like cookng for months now. I wonder how that would go over with a partner. Sometimes I don't know how anyone can live with anyone else. My man really wants to shack up with me, but in my current one room apartment it's out of the question. There are families living in these small apartments and I don't know how they manage. I think your apartment is roomier than mine, so I imagine after some time you'll create your own personal spaces where you'll find sanctuary, don't you think?

  6. Hey Jelly,

    Good to see you're up to commenting, at least. :) Is your man Korean, too? I don't know if the wet floor is a Korean thing or a Korean man thing, you know?

    You should come out to the wedding (Ulsan--is that where you are?--isn't too far from Daegu...). Send me an e-mail and I'll send you the details.

    Yeah... before I renewed this contract, I told Min Gi that if we were getting married, we needed an apartment where I could close the door if I needed to. We found a two bedroom that suits our needs admirably. ;-)

  7. I love the reference to the wet floor. Without fail, no matter which guy is gracing my apartment (or the love motel) with his presence...once he's done in the bathroom, it's soaked. It looks like a water bomb has gone off. Haha. And I think it's a Kboy thing. I've vacationed with Kgirls and spent time at their houses and everything is pretty much dry.


    P.S. Congrats on the coming marriage. I've been reading for a while, I just haven't gotten a chance to comment yet.^^

  8. I think Korean men are vigorous washers. :) Thanks, Grace. I enjoy your blog, too. It takes me back to my dating days in this country... good times, good times.

  9. I'm a new reader of your blog, but I had just had to comment about the floor-wetting thing.

    My bf is Korean (we live in the US) and after he takes a shower, my whole bathroom is wet. A few weeks ago, he took a shower and then asked me if I had clean pants for him because his were all wet. I asked how they got wet - his reply "I took a shower, weren't you listening?" Were you wearing the pants in the shower? I really just want to know how he does it.

    Anyway, I'm enjoying your writing!

  10. Damn, ladies. I'm glad I'm not alone in this bathroom floor-wetting phenomenon.

    ALM--for your info (it could help) bathrooms in Korea are designed with a drain in the floor and rarely have the shower curtain, so when you take a shower, you really do soak the floor. I'm just impressed that Min Gi manages to accomplish this feat with regular hand washing, also.



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