Saturday, October 3, 2009

Anger and Missing Out

Posted to my UC forum:

I write to you from my living room. This is not where I am supposed to be right now. I am supposed to be spending the first Chuseok with my fiance's family. Chuseok is a family holiday in Korea akin to Christmas for Christians or Passover for Jews.

Last night I started having bloody diarrhea every hour. It didn't let up much overnight, and now I'm missing the chance at forming real bonds with my new family because of this STUPID disease. I HATE it. And I won't get to do this next year because we are moving back to the States next summer.

This diease is NOT FAIR! I would curse, but this forum has moderation (and I want it to still be a respectful place).

Can anyone else relate to feeling like they are missing out on their life because of this disease? Some days it's all I can do to go to work and come home. And I have a MILD case--I can only imagine what those of you with more moderate to severe versions are experiencing.

At any rate, my fiance is being very supportive and understanding, but I know he's disappointed (I would be, too). I worry now that something like this will happen on our wedding day or some other time that's just as awful. I don't want to spend the rest of my life worried about what I'm going to miss out on next.

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